'it is impossible to combine languid sauntering with tripping over a cat.'

'nothing brings people together like a Christmas lung fungus'

'cake or death?  cake, please'

'i'd love to be in a midnight fire at sea'

'he studied amongst other things the art of the rapier (thank god for that little i)'

'mice and men cliff notes bring girl to tears'

'we're watching animal porn.  we'll return you to mary had a little lamb in a minute'

'i can't smoke in the white house but she can pee in leo's closet?'

'i carried a watermelon?'

'do you really know a lot of people that say she's good-looking?  you must have a wide aquaintance with the astigmatic'

'that novel, that novel you been working on, been working on that for some time now'

'the eight i'd really rather you didn't's' 

'it was on display in the bottom of a locked filing cabinet stuck in a disused lavatory with a sign on the door saying 'beware of the leopard''

'we'll be crossing our t's and dotting our...lowercase j's'

'this is not the salad of my people'

'well i got a banana and in a pinch he can put up some shelves'